Yarrrrr!
So, today, as I was searching for an etymology of the word "Ciao!" (which, incidentally, is spelled "Ceau" in Romanian), I stumbled across a couple of articles indicating that the word "hello" didn't become common until some time into the 20th century, and that its common usage in spoken English today is primarily due, ironically enough, to its somewhat artificial designation first as a standard telephone greeting.
In fact, shortly after the invention of the telephone, there seems to have been a debate between Alexander Graham Bell and his associates about the proper thing for people to say when they answer the phone.
I can only imagine how this must have gone.
Alexander Graham Bell: Good day, everyone. I've called you all together for this meeting in order to come to a decision regarding the proper etiquette for use of this new machine we have created. Obviously the person on the far end must say something to confirm to the caller that he has successfully received the call and can now begin a conversation. What should he say? I'd like to hear your ideas?
Geoffrey: Hm. How about, "I hereby respond!"
Alexander: Perhaps.
Arthur: "I am answering!"
Alexander: A little stiff, it seems.
Geoffrey: "It's me!"
Arthur: No, that would be, "It is I!"
Geoffrey: Ha. Pretentious bastard.
Arthur: You can't answer a telephone by calling someone a pretentious bastard!
Geoffrey: No, you're the pretentious bastard, not the caller.
Arthur: What do I have to do with this?
Alexander: People, people, can we focus on the task at hand?
Geoffrey: Apologies, sir. Um, "Tally ho!"
Arthur: What does that mean, anyway? Who's tallying? And what's being counted? Um, I'd say, "Acknowledged!"
Geoffrey: "Yow!"
Arthur: "Biff!"
Geoffrey: "Pow!"
Arthur: "Zam!"
Geoffrey: "Holy rotary dials, Batman, we have a call!"
Arthur: You ridiculous imbecile! Everyone knows any mention of Batman in 1885 is a pointless anachronism! Why I put up with you people. Hm, we could say, "Great Scot!"
Alexander: Um, Yes?
Geoffrey: Yes, what? Answer the telephone with "yes?"
Alexander: Oh, I suppose. Actually that's not a bad idea, really. But, no, I thought you were addressing me. I was born in Edinburgh, you know.
Arthur: I thought you moved here from Nova Scotia?
Alexander: Well, I wasn't born there. Why would any Canadian . . . other than Alexander Keith, of course . . . have as ridiculous a Scottish brogue as I do?
Arthur: Ah, yes. Fair enough. Well, what do you recommend, Alexander?
Alexander: So glad you asked. I say we go with "Ahoy!" What do you think, lads?
Arthur: Ahoy. . . .
Alexander: Yes, ahoy. Like this . . . "Ahooooyyyyyy!"
Arthur: . . .
Geoffrey: [cough] What are you? Some kind of . . . technology pirate? We haven't spotted land, for Christ's sake — we just picked up a mechanical . . . uh . . . electric . . . talking machine . . . thingy. Uh, my point being, I mean, sir, if people say "Ahoy!" their friends are all just going to laugh at them.
Alexander: Well, what if we doubled it? As in "Ahoy! Ahoy!" That doesn't sound quite so piratey, does it?
Arthur: . . .
Geoffrey: If metrosexual Latino pop-star pirates don't count, then . . . no.
Alexander: You gentlemen are frankly impossible. What do you expect? I know, how's this. We can adopt the youngsters' hipster lingo and shorten it to "Hoy!" or something. That would really hook them. "[ringgggg] Hoy!"
Geoffrey: . . .
Arthur: . . .
Alexander: I assume that's a no. Well, I challenge you to come up with something better then, you twits.
Geoffrey: Well, I hear that Edison guy is suggesting that people say "Hello."
Alexander: Edison, huh?
Arthur: Yes, sir. I know you're not a big fan of the guy, but you have to admit, it does have a certain . . . ring to it. Ha! I said ring. That's funny. You know, a pun.
Alexander: Hmph. "Hallo." Really, now.
Geoffrey: Well, sort of. "Hello," is how he says it, actually. A little less shouty like. "Hello." I think it's kind of nice, really.
Alexander: Nice? That's preposterous! Might as well answer the damn thing by saying, "Pickled herring!" Or "Flatulence!" Or "Perspicacity!"
Arthur: Um, Alexander? . . .
Alexander: "Flibbertigibbet!"
Geoffrey: Hey, Alex. . . .
Alexander: Oh, Edison, my foot!
Arthur: [whispers] Um, Geoffrey, wanna just get out of here and grab a beer?
Geoffrey: Lord, please. Twist my arm.
Alexander: [shouting after them] "Coelocanth! Qcepo!"
In fact, shortly after the invention of the telephone, there seems to have been a debate between Alexander Graham Bell and his associates about the proper thing for people to say when they answer the phone.
I can only imagine how this must have gone.
Alexander Graham Bell: Good day, everyone. I've called you all together for this meeting in order to come to a decision regarding the proper etiquette for use of this new machine we have created. Obviously the person on the far end must say something to confirm to the caller that he has successfully received the call and can now begin a conversation. What should he say? I'd like to hear your ideas?
Geoffrey: Hm. How about, "I hereby respond!"
Alexander: Perhaps.
Arthur: "I am answering!"
Alexander: A little stiff, it seems.
Geoffrey: "It's me!"
Arthur: No, that would be, "It is I!"
Geoffrey: Ha. Pretentious bastard.
Arthur: You can't answer a telephone by calling someone a pretentious bastard!
Geoffrey: No, you're the pretentious bastard, not the caller.
Arthur: What do I have to do with this?
Alexander: People, people, can we focus on the task at hand?
Geoffrey: Apologies, sir. Um, "Tally ho!"
Arthur: What does that mean, anyway? Who's tallying? And what's being counted? Um, I'd say, "Acknowledged!"
Geoffrey: "Yow!"
Arthur: "Biff!"
Geoffrey: "Pow!"
Arthur: "Zam!"
Geoffrey: "Holy rotary dials, Batman, we have a call!"
Arthur: You ridiculous imbecile! Everyone knows any mention of Batman in 1885 is a pointless anachronism! Why I put up with you people. Hm, we could say, "Great Scot!"
Alexander: Um, Yes?
Geoffrey: Yes, what? Answer the telephone with "yes?"
Alexander: Oh, I suppose. Actually that's not a bad idea, really. But, no, I thought you were addressing me. I was born in Edinburgh, you know.
Arthur: I thought you moved here from Nova Scotia?
Alexander: Well, I wasn't born there. Why would any Canadian . . . other than Alexander Keith, of course . . . have as ridiculous a Scottish brogue as I do?
Arthur: Ah, yes. Fair enough. Well, what do you recommend, Alexander?
Alexander: So glad you asked. I say we go with "Ahoy!" What do you think, lads?
Arthur: Ahoy. . . .
Alexander: Yes, ahoy. Like this . . . "Ahooooyyyyyy!"
Arthur: . . .
Geoffrey: [cough] What are you? Some kind of . . . technology pirate? We haven't spotted land, for Christ's sake — we just picked up a mechanical . . . uh . . . electric . . . talking machine . . . thingy. Uh, my point being, I mean, sir, if people say "Ahoy!" their friends are all just going to laugh at them.
Alexander: Well, what if we doubled it? As in "Ahoy! Ahoy!" That doesn't sound quite so piratey, does it?
Arthur: . . .
Geoffrey: If metrosexual Latino pop-star pirates don't count, then . . . no.
Alexander: You gentlemen are frankly impossible. What do you expect? I know, how's this. We can adopt the youngsters' hipster lingo and shorten it to "Hoy!" or something. That would really hook them. "[ringgggg] Hoy!"
Geoffrey: . . .
Arthur: . . .
Alexander: I assume that's a no. Well, I challenge you to come up with something better then, you twits.
Geoffrey: Well, I hear that Edison guy is suggesting that people say "Hello."
Alexander: Edison, huh?
Arthur: Yes, sir. I know you're not a big fan of the guy, but you have to admit, it does have a certain . . . ring to it. Ha! I said ring. That's funny. You know, a pun.
Alexander: Hmph. "Hallo." Really, now.
Geoffrey: Well, sort of. "Hello," is how he says it, actually. A little less shouty like. "Hello." I think it's kind of nice, really.
Alexander: Nice? That's preposterous! Might as well answer the damn thing by saying, "Pickled herring!" Or "Flatulence!" Or "Perspicacity!"
Arthur: Um, Alexander? . . .
Alexander: "Flibbertigibbet!"
Geoffrey: Hey, Alex. . . .
Alexander: Oh, Edison, my foot!
Arthur: [whispers] Um, Geoffrey, wanna just get out of here and grab a beer?
Geoffrey: Lord, please. Twist my arm.
Alexander: [shouting after them] "Coelocanth! Qcepo!"