The Definition of Ugly
The SkyTrain is always an unending cross-section of Vancouver's tapestry of souls. On the ride downtown yesterday to see a Vancouver International Film Festival film, I thought we'd made our interesting observation of the day when the woman in the seat across from us trimmed her fingernails there on the train.
But then, a few hours later, we caught another train home. And were joined right away by a man and a woman, the woman explaining something to him at the time, roughly summarized below.
"You don't understand. I hate ugly people. Ugly people are ugly. With their beady little eyes. Small eyes are ugly. Small squinty eyes are especially ugly. Short people are ugly. People who are underweight or overweight are ugly. Some people who are too tall are ugly, but mostly short people. And what's the point of being ugly? I mean, that's just ugly. I don't see how short people or overweight or underweight people can go out in public. If they go in public they should just cover themselves up like those Arabian women. There's no point in living if you're ugly. And that's not all. Dark hair and dark eyes are ugly. Light hair and light eyes that aren't natural are ugly. How many people do you think naturally have light hair and light eyes? You can't change it. If you make your hair lighter on purpose you're still ugly. So dark hair and dark eyes are ugly. And hair that's tangly. Why don't people just cut it off. Short hair is ugly, though. And hair that's too long is ugly. And those women who wear no makeup or earrings, they're ugly. And big noses are ugly. Big huge noses are ugly. When a nose is too big it's not a nose; it's a beak, and it's damn ugly."
"Is that all?" asked her partner.
"Yes, I think so."
We rode in silence for about 10 minutes. Then we hear a conversation starting up behind us.
"But I still tell you, that woman was UGLY. With her small squinty eyes, and small eyes are ugly. And short people are ugly. And overweight and underweight people are ugly, too. . . ."
But then, a few hours later, we caught another train home. And were joined right away by a man and a woman, the woman explaining something to him at the time, roughly summarized below.
"You don't understand. I hate ugly people. Ugly people are ugly. With their beady little eyes. Small eyes are ugly. Small squinty eyes are especially ugly. Short people are ugly. People who are underweight or overweight are ugly. Some people who are too tall are ugly, but mostly short people. And what's the point of being ugly? I mean, that's just ugly. I don't see how short people or overweight or underweight people can go out in public. If they go in public they should just cover themselves up like those Arabian women. There's no point in living if you're ugly. And that's not all. Dark hair and dark eyes are ugly. Light hair and light eyes that aren't natural are ugly. How many people do you think naturally have light hair and light eyes? You can't change it. If you make your hair lighter on purpose you're still ugly. So dark hair and dark eyes are ugly. And hair that's tangly. Why don't people just cut it off. Short hair is ugly, though. And hair that's too long is ugly. And those women who wear no makeup or earrings, they're ugly. And big noses are ugly. Big huge noses are ugly. When a nose is too big it's not a nose; it's a beak, and it's damn ugly."
"Is that all?" asked her partner.
"Yes, I think so."
We rode in silence for about 10 minutes. Then we hear a conversation starting up behind us.
"But I still tell you, that woman was UGLY. With her small squinty eyes, and small eyes are ugly. And short people are ugly. And overweight and underweight people are ugly, too. . . ."